Me Like Hockey

So my dear wife and I were at the in-laws over the long weekend, and decided to sit down and watch the hockey game (Ottawa vs Toronto). While doing so, a few things became apparent:

Hockey is perfect to knit through

Project this game was the Kiri shawl. I think it'll be very pretty when done. The pattern knits from the neck down, and so gets rather large at the stage I'm at right now (about 250 stitches/row), and so is perfect mindless "black hole" knitting for watching the Sens play.

I like the new rules

I'm hardly a rabid hockey fan, I do enjoy watching the Sens play, but my understanding of the game itself is hardly extensive. My opinion is based purely on observation, not on any guru-like technical comprehension. The new rules do seem to result in more scoring, as promised, which I have mixed feelings on. I feel a little bad for retired players whose records are going to get broken....but that is, I suppose, a relatively minor point. I like that more penalties are being called...the rules are seeming to actually mean something, at last. And I think it's very good that the rule change is favouring faster, better offense and goaltending, which will (I hope) cut back on the "thugging out" of teams that was happening.

I don't like hockey announcers

While I'm generally fairly tolerant about the abuse of the English language by some members of the population, I have rather higher standards for those who are, presumably, earning a living by using words. And, like it or not, sports announcers fall under this category. Two particular gems stood out in the game last night:

"He's got the puck! He's all alone! He's converging on the net!"

Converging: approaching each other towards the tip

By definition, to converge on the net, there would have to be at least one other player. While hockey players are indeed large, even very large men cannot converge all on their own. But nice try.

"He's a goal scorer. He scores goals. He knows where to go to score the goals"

There is an amusing element of "See Spot. See Spot run. Run spot run" in the structure of this eloquent commentary, but it is the content that interests me the most. We are watching a hockey game. With, yes, hockey players. I assume that it is a minimum requirement of playing in the NHL that players...even those who are not goal scorers....know where to go to score the goals. For those unfamiliar with the game, the answer is, of course, the net. Not the parking lot out back, not the stands, the net.

"He doesn't have as much confidence as he thinks he has!"

This confounds me. It is either a statement of profound idiocy, or an incredibly deep zen meditation statment that is simply beyond me.

Confidence: assurance: freedom from doubt; belief in
yourself and your abilities.

Stunning.